1- Change The Vocabulary
Minor adjustments in vocabulary – both in self-talk and interacting with others – can make a big difference. Starting a meeting by saying “we are doing so well in Area A – how can we replicate this success in Area B? ” is better way to set the scene for some corrective action than to say “We have a big mess in Area B and we need to fix this!”.
2. Kill Negative Thoughts Quickly
Whenever you start hearing that negative voice inside you and you start to criticize yourself, it is best to simply just kill the thought there and then. This can be by changing the setting, moving away from your desk, changing the topic, whatever. You literally have to silently yell at yourself to stop it!
3- Limit the Absolutes
When you say to yourself “I have never been good at this”, you set yourself up for failure. Modify this to “I have often had some difficulty with this” and you give yourself space to improve and get better.
4. Don’t Try to be Perfect
Everyone has a right to make mistakes, to stumble, to fail and to fall. No one is perfect so don’t scold yourself if you have setbacks. Just say to yourself “it’s OK, I am going to get there anyway“.
5. Accept Responsibility for How You Feel
No one else is responsible for how you feel other than yourself. Your emotions and feelings are yours and what others think about you and say to you has only that impact that you have allowed
6. Avoid “I Can’t Do This” Language
It is best to focus on what you can achieve even if this is in small steps or increments. Reminding yourself of your strengths and potential helps to keep you on course. Avoid negative language like “i know I can’t do this” because it is just a way of ensuring you fail.
This is not a lot to remember. You don’t have to start with all 6 of the above strategies. Just pick a few that seem right to you and start practicing these to get the difference you have always wanted.